There are truths that are concrete facts. Then there are truths that we want to believe as fact. And then there are some truths that stay hidden. But what if we turn truth into a perspective rather than a fact? Truth is a fact. Trust, though, is a perspective; people tend to confront only what they are willing to see. Besides that—the heart has reasons of which the mind knows nothing of.
Trust— an assured reliance on the character, ability, strength or truth of someone or something.*
Have you ever done a Trust Fall? There was a summer camp (because all Trust Falls take place at summer camps) that I went to when I was in middle school and they would have us do a Trust Fall on the last day of a weeklong camp. We would go up with 5 or 6 friends, taking turns to climb up a 4 foot ladder. One at a time, arms crossed against our chest, turning around backward and falling into the arms of our friends—trusting them to catch our fall.
But what happens when trust is broken? They say it takes a lifetime to build trust and only a second to break it. Or…. is it our broken pride that breaks trust—that essentially breaks trust. When we walk away so easily from someone because our trust is broken aren’t we in fact breaking their trust in us?
Now there are some bad apples out there that we need to be wary of, trusting from a distance may be in order with some. But to revoke the trust in someone because they hurt you seems like one’s ego has been down and their vulnerable side has been affected. To believe in this idea that once trust is broken then it will take a lifetime to repair is a highly perfected standard that I fear we all fall short of.
I myself have broken everyone’s trust on some level or another. Whether I left out small details from an embarrassing story or stained a roommate’s favorite outfit and told a lie about that said stain magically appearing. Perhaps I really messed things up and gave someone cause to be disappointed in me. I have then altered the perfect standard and revealed my true hot mess of self. But to dismiss me because I am human seems to be a problem that is outside my range of fixing. I have had people (who shall of course remain anonymous) whom have sworn to be by my side, then if I broke your trust, did you not break mine back by walking away? You made a promise to always be there, that promise does not end or go away or get retracted when I reveal that I am not a perfect person. Does this not mean that you, in fact, broke your promise and by so doing broke my trust in you? The difference is in knowing when someone is a bad apple and when one’s own ego has been bruised.
There are times when we don’t trust our heart, or when we doubt a loved one’s virtue because the action or evidence stacks against them. They are not perfect, but that’s kinda the point—no one is. We have all mess up, we all fall short throughout our lifetime. We can’t know for sure that it’s going to be okay. All we can do is embrace that fact that we are all in the same boat, and have a little faith that things will be better with time.
Here is to all of us—young and wise—may we open our hearts and learn to trust for a lifetime!
***Follow me on Facebook and Instagram @heres2grownups for random blurbs and post updates. I will–hopefully–be posting a blog every Monday and Thursday! Feel free to comment and tell me your story. Also if anyone is on good terms with Ellen Degeneres, I’d love to get noticed by her!